I am back after month…I think it’s time to start writing in English again, as some of my readers are actually English it’s the least I can do. From now on, I will try to translate as many as my French posts (on Pomdepin in wonderland) as possible.
So apparently, I am an horrible liberal, elitist, posh internationalist citizen of nowhere, or something, according to our
Supreme Guide prime minister (I am not sure, but I think she just means that I can read). I was already a bloody European migrant, really, it’s like I am doing it on purpose. Just to be annoying. But that nothing compared to the traitors, the remainers. Imagine that, they are British and yet they love Europe, how dare they? And they don’t even have the decency to shut up and let the county sink into a fascist regime (I haven’t broken Godwin’s law yet, but be patient…). The thing is, if the worst happens, the bloody European migrants like me can escape. We still have 27 countries (maybe 28 soon, with an independant Scotland) to seek refuge in. Not our remainers friends. They will be stripped against their will of their European citizenship. They will be stuck here with the crazy mobs and their nazi aspirations (oops, told you!). It’s so unfair.
The majority could not care less. We are not talking about football or the great British bake of, so who gives a dam? But you can still find some people who get all agitated over brexit. First the brexiters themselves, who feel so empowered by their so called victory that they can relish in their true nature and be openly abusive and racist. But the remainers are still there too, and they have not given up the fight. They demonstrate in front of the high court, they write over and over to their MPs and to the media, they petition non stop, they refuse to answer the school census, they affirm their European conviction with pride, they challenge all xenophobic morons, they explain about the economy, over and over again. And it is starting to work. Finally, the parliament humiliated by Theresa May and her henchmen, seems to wake up. It was amazing to see MPs who normally would despise each other, being united and fighting together against the government’s rhetoric of hate, bigotry and economical suicide. I may be naive, but I am sure the fantastic persistence of remainers who keep writing to their MPs has helped convinced them to finally stand up for the good of the whole nation.
All these courageous remainers are being ridiculed daily by the press. Stupid as*holes without even one functioning brain cell shout abuse at them. Of course the remainers are horrible traitors and liars, it’s not like the pound is at a 168 years low…oh wait! Banks and businesses are fleeing the country, but hey, who cares? Ok maybe the marmitegate in Tesco was a sign that eventually not everything will be nice and rosy when article 50 is activated. But it’s purely the remainers’ fault, it’s their negative talks of bad consequences that is actually conjuring them. Hum, hello brexiters, we are not in Beetlejuice! You cannot make thinks happened just because you are talking about them. I know you are pretty delusional about stuff like reality and the truth, but if the remainers had that kind of magical power, I am pretty sure their priority right now would not be to get ride of marmite first. And no, the remainers do not rejoice in every bad news even when they are proven right, they are actually fighting to save the country from even bigger disasters.
So to the few remainers who come and read me (in French) I would like to say thank you, you are the best, you are the reason why I haven’t completely lost faith in the British people. Thank you so, so much, you are the true great Britons.